Karanvir Gupta
This article can be deemed to be an intrigued piece of writing – intrigued by how the ambit of feminism is being extrapolated anywhere and everywhere. It has been a year when I first had a face-to-face with this hyped and false feminism. I was travelling via Delhi metro when suddenly a girl started shouting at a male traveler for not giving her a seat. He silently got up and offered her the seat. I brushed the event. This happened again, this time the girl snapped but luckily the guy was accompanied by his pregnant wife and it saved him the grace. Next time I saw a girl (seated) giving really bad stares to the men sitting opposite her for not giving seat to the aged standing. I was shocked. Where in the book of moral science, it is written that males alone have to offer seats to the aged, ladies with children, or expecting women or the fairer sex always.
I came back and discussed this with a friend of mine. He reacted in as composed manner as possible. He told me this has become way too common. I didn’t like this. On one hand we talk about equal rights and on the other hand we are still being biased. We want equal status in society, education, politics or realm of affairs yet we expect men to treat women in a particular fashion.Not that I am against any of this but I am absolutely against hypocrite feminism.
When I saw Deepika Padukone’s #mychoice video, I was taken aback. This is how you promote and support feminism. I was scared to speak my mind out that I hated the video unless a female friend of mine shared her dissent with the video on social media. I felt relieved. Because even though I would agree with the liberty of the mind and soul, I have apprehensions about when the video earmarked anything as her choice. I always believed that the social milieu and the culture that holds our roots speaks about #Ourchoice. With my parents, my siblings, my extended family, then my partner and my children; when was it my choice? No, it was always#Ourchoice!
Sorry but in the haste of empowerment, the video actually got the message wrong. All this false word about feminism has undoubtedly put the male at peril. For few minutes while you read the article, ask your dads, your brothers and ask yourself, have they(you) never ogled the opposite sex even once (or even the same for that matter)? I have female friends who share that what appealed to them about men they were staring at and what was not-so-good about him. Just when we reverse the tables, it becomes insensitive. Why so? This is the natural law of attraction. Drawing lines is a must however!
But if we keep getting into the minute details, we will reach no conclusion but more confusion. The point I want to make here is this whole hullabaloo about false feminism is landing many men into trouble. We should be well aware that though women are harassed and abused (sexually and mentally), men are abused too. Men are also raped, abused, exploited and with this spreading viral of so-called feminism men are nothing but left at the behest of the whims and fancies of women.
I am not generalizing but yes I am sending a word of caution. Because of our so bandwagon mentality as always we make ourselves believe that what the masses are doing is ought to be right. Sadly, that is not the truth. Neither all the men are same nor all the women. And this needs to be considered seriously. The recent case of Jasleen Kaur and Sarvjeet Singh is an example where facts and fictionwere actually muddled. The social media has given us the power to share and spread but unfortunately it has made us the law and verdict too (along with option of having an opinion). Even before the evidence were collected, factual details reported we came to a conclusion. May be the guy actually harassed her and may be he didn’t. But then there was a may be involved, which we conveniently kept aside. And the result is in front of us!
While I was little skeptical of writing this article, I am sure it will make some sense to all of us. Yes, you can judge me but to all women out there who knows if it is your brother or husband who might face the brunt of this fake feminism. I am sure that this one sided tale is not what feminism calls for.
Feminism stands for equality, advocacy of her rights on the equality of sexes. She should have the right to be born, right to education, right to live a healthy life and right to prosper in her life (personally and professionally). Feminism nowhere means undermining or equating it with male’s duties and responsibilities. Each sex has its own sets of responsibilities which can be very well shared and respected. It is a mutually beneficial and amicable relationship between the two. And that is why they complement each other so well.
Next time you stand for feminism, I will stand with you too! But please make sure that just for the sake of it you are not putting an innocent’s life at risk. Before you really mean it, make sure that you respect your mother at home, you respect the privacy of your sister, and you listen to your wife for her opinion. If we all start at our homes, the need to take it to social media and streets will vanish. And we will be able to stop media from selling feminism that has to be earned and then inherited, not commercialized. After all, women is not a subject of objectification – she never was!
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