Arun Kumar Gupta
In our Indian traditions, respecting parents has been said to be a new necessity. There are deep reasons for this in our lives. This reason is practical and theoretical too. Because it affects our whole life. To understand this, deep thinking will have to be done so that we can know the hidden secrets behind the matter of respecting parents. We will be able to accept this thing only when we know its consequences properly.
Our sages knew this deep mystery very well and had understood that everything in this world is moving like a wheel. Our life is also like a cycle and we are moving in this cycle from birth to death and vice versa. Our life is not like a straight line but like a circle whose first point is birth and the second point is death.
The very first stage is childhood and the last stage is old age. That’s why elders are respected so much and when nearing their end, they become like children again.
Just understand this, our life is a circular journey in which we are at the peak of our life around the age of 25-35 years. After staying here for a few years, the decline starts like the sun starts setting after staying at its highest peak for a short time in the afternoon as it is visible in the morning while rising. The time of sunrise in the morning is the childhood of the Sun and sunset in the evening can be considered as the old age of the Sun as these two conditions are similar in many ways.
When a man gets old, he reaches the same state of mind as he used to have during his childhood. Everyone pampers a child, but very few pamper an old man, most people avoid old people, not only remaining indifferent towards them but also ignoring them.
There are many reasons for this, one such reason being that people consider the existence of a “generation gap”. Such people even forgive a child but do not forgive the old people because they do not know the secret that the old man becomes like a child.
Indian mystics understood this secret, it has been said to have respect and kindness towards the elders. It is very important to do this because not only children but elders/parents also deserve respect and forgiveness.
Indian culture has taught us to respect the elderly and care for them, keeping in mind these psychological reasons and the situations created by them. The old man becomes like a child while that child is not visible. This is the reason that when an elderly person makes a mistake, we forget that he is childlike and now has not understood, and thus we don’t forgive them. We should respect our old parents only by knowing their psychological reasons which is creating such situations which we must comprehend and aid other elderly people during these tough times.
We have to behave with elders as we handle our children very gently and soulfully because of their state of mind. Even if they act unwisely, their advice should not be ignored because there is a saying that “Every dark cloud has a silver lining”. What they state or say is always a piece of advice for us that has a hidden meaning for our overall betterment.
Other reasons for respecting parents/elders should also be understood. Indian culture has considered parents to be worshipable after God. Although we have not seen God, the parents and elders are the incarnation of God which must be revered by all of us. The place of the mother is considered above the father as there is a saying that “There is heaven at her feet”. There is no teacher like a mother as she brings up her children and is the first nurturer of them. Likewise, the father is the breadwinner of the family.
The mother gives birth, the child opens its eyes in her lap, survives on her milk, and learns to speak only from the mother, that is why its language is called mother tongue. It is the result of mother’s hardship and efforts that today we have become civilized and educated too. We get to know how much pain the mother has taken in bringing us up and raising us only, when we nurture our children.
How alert a mother is towards her children every moment, can be known from the fact that even when she is asleep, the gentle noise of her baby crying would compel her to wake up and console them. Our Mother has done us so many favours that we cannot repay the debt even after serving her for our whole life.
We come to the conclusion that just as parents nurture us by performing their duty, similarly it is our duty to respect them. Take full care of their comfort and convenience and do not behave in such a way that they will get hurt in any way. Irrespective of the circumstances, it is our most pious duty that the parents who have suffered many hardships and nurtured us while living a struggling life, educated us to make us worthy of someone, thus, we should give full respect to them in their old age, take full care of them and take care of their comforts so that their soul becomes happy and satisfied and blesses us.
(The writer is the President of Arya Samaj Dayanand Marg, City Chowk, Jammu)
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